Five things I've learnt in 2015 so far...

The ninth month of this year has said goodbye. That means there are about 90 days left before we see the start of 2016. I dunno about you but I have no clue where the hell this year has gone. Seriously. Once again I am staring down the barrel of another realisation that this year hasn’t necessarily been the agent of change that I hoped it would be. I have written this sentiment a lot over the past 24 months. I have lost weight, I have gained it. I have repeated the cycle a couple of times. I am not going to go into the logistics of why, or how. I am just going to acknowledge that I am probably not exactly where I had hoped to be, and I am going to acknowledge that I am ok with that. I am not totally stoked, but I am not totally upset. I am ok, and that is ok.

As October says hello and the weeks of 2015 continue to disappear, I have been doing a bit of thinking. I guess you could describe it as a bit of a stock take. Re-evaluation of where I am at, why I am here, and what the heck I need to do to change the picture that is ahead of me. There is a bunch of stuff. My head is full of thoughts, and feelings and emotions. Honestly, its made me a little erratic. But I am trying to sift through them, one by one. I realised, the last 9 months have been full of some new learnings for me. So, what better way to process than for me to write about them. Maybe you will learn something too.

1. Shit Happens.
 Sometimes you just can’t plan. It doesn’t matter how many lists, tables, or goals that you have. Sometimes life has a plan of its own and you don’t get to find out what it is until its already happening. Sometimes you just have to go with it. You have to let go and be okay with not being in the driver seat. Now for someone like me, who is a bit of a control freak, this is not an easy thing to learn or understand. Letting go is not a sign of weakness. On the contrary I believe that it takes great strength to realise that sometimes you need to change you path, take a step back, or just stop all together. So far this year I have had to do all three of those things, and yeah, in the first instance I got pretty pissed off about it. I have realised now there was probably a reason that it had to happen, I still don’t know some of it, but I am open to finding out.

2. Sometimes we need to concentrate on one thing at a time. 
Partially linked to the above thought I suppose, but I learnt that trying to do everything at once isn’t often the best way to move forward. The pressure and stress of it all can be immense, the failure can be amplified and the crash, well the crash always ends up big, messy and loud. I went through an incredibly difficult time at the beginning of the year when my grandfather passed away. I realised pretty quickly that losing weight, running a business, writing a blog and a bunch of other stuff, just weren’t the priority. I had to just be gentle with myself and try to piece things back together. Since then, I have picked a lot of the stuff back up, and added a few extra little bits in too. But this time there is a lens for each area. Almost like a little draw, with all that information. I try not to have more than two or three open at a time. It keeps me feeling more in control and it keeps me focused.

3. Some people just don’t care 
I am a giver. I give a lot of myself, and in turn, I tend to expect that everyone else is the same as me. Turns out they aren’t. Some people just don’t care as much. It’s not that they aren’t necessarily interested, They just have different priorities. Or different ways of showing that they care. I think I have been really let down over the last few months by my expectations of people. I am trying to work on that one… It is certainly a work in progress.

4. Everyone has an opinion.
And everyone wants to tell you it. Whether we are talking about losing weight, wedding planning, fashion, or bloody almost anything else. Everyone knows the answer to everything… Duh. Or at least, they have an opinion. Which obviously needs to be heard. I think the wedding planning side of things has bought this to the surface even more. People have an opinion about everything. Flowers, hair, venues. Don’t get me started on dresses. But it is also pretty rife in the health / wellness scene as well. Everyone has the answer. ‘This’ weight loss method worked for one so if you just do exactly the same thing it will OBVIOUSLY work for you, even though you live a completely different life, in a completely different situation.

5. Loving yourself is one of the most important thing in the world. 
Its the only thing that matters when life gets in the way. Its the thing that keeps you getting up in the morning, shaving your legs, and putting on a little make up [can I get an amen ladies?] I think this is linked to a lot of the other things I have already written. But its so the truth. Anyway you look at it. No one can truly love you, until you love yourself. I know, it's cliche. But it's the truth. So hold onto it. Love yourself. And don't let anyone tel you otherwise.

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